Democratic Senatorial candidate Liz Warren’s latest excuse for claiming minority status is so risibly absurd, the mind boggles trying to imagine the ones she rejected:
10. I told Harvard I drove a Jeep Cherokee and somehow they got confused.
9. Seriously, would a person who created much of the intellectual foundation for Occupy Wall Street lie about being 1/32 Cherokee?
8. In my impressionable youth, I was brainwashed by Cher’s megahit Half Breed.
7. I'm Red, Scott's Brown. What's the problem?
6. People who doubt my Native-American heritage are the same evil conservatives who question President Obama’s divinity.
5. Ward Churchill swore I looked Cherokee-ish.
4. Cherokees are Native-Americans. Native-Americans fertilize crops with fish. Herring are fish. My maiden name is Herring. Somehow those facts got all mixed up in my young mind.
3. You’d believe me if I were a man.
2. As a child in Oklahoma, I used to play lacrosse, a Native-American game. One day, I suffered a concussion and woke up thinking I was Princess Moonbat of the Cherokee Nation.
1. I never thought I’d get caught.